


Loud and Clear

by discospock (consultingasshat)



Series: Spirk Ficlets [3]
Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: First Kiss, Love Confessions, M/M, There's no mind meld but there's certainly.... transference, this gets real sappy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-27
Updated: 2017-02-27
Packaged: 2018-09-27 05:21:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,983
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9974828
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/consultingasshat/pseuds/discospock
Summary: Spock accidentally picks up on some of Jim's thoughts and deals with the results.





	

**Author's Note:**

> i suck at summaries but this is good i promise 
> 
> from an anon prompt on my tumblr: "a prompt: spock standing close to the captains chair + accidental touching"

“Hey, Spock? Could you come over here and look at this report for a second?”

Spock turned promptly from his station at the sound of his captain’s voice, catching sight of Jim’s bright smile before anything else. Spock nodded once and briskly walked over to stand at the side of the captain’s chair, placing a hand on the back of it yet still hyper-aware of making sure he did not touch Jim. However, Jim immediately leaned back, his bare neck resting against the knuckle of Spock’s thumb. He could not find it in himself to move away.

“So, see, it says here that Kollona is a desert planet, right? And I know we’re still a few days away from it, but I was doing some reading up on it and read that it has an extensive rainforest? Which would not make sense at all, _obviously_ , but…” Jim’s voice faded out in Spock’s ears as he suddenly got a bright flash of thought through their skin to skin contact.

_he probably thinks I’m so stupid, just going on about this_

Spock blinked down at Jim, slightly startled and strangely unsettled by the fact that Jim would think something like that. He tried to tune back into what Jim was saying, but all he heard was “... and I mean, a bird that could breathe while in sand? Now _that_ just didn’t seem right…” before-

_if I keep talking will he just stay there? God, I don’t even know what I’m saying anymore, he’s probably listening to me go on about this silly planet and wanting to run as fast as those beautiful Vulcan legs can carry him_

Spock didn’t think he could move right now, even if someone tried to forcefully remove him from his stance beside Jim’s chair. He struggled to catch what Jim was still saying, but his captain just thought _so loudly_ -

_god he’s so cute when he’s focusing on something_

Spock thought he might need to check himself into medbay for heart failure.

“You get it, Mr. Spock? We’ve got two completely different reports and one planet. So, what do you say?” Spock forcefully brought himself back to the present to see Jim smiling at him, a real smile, and Spock felt a flash of regret for listening in on his thoughts.

“I understand, Jim. The most efficient plan…” Spock trailed off, suddenly realizing he had no idea what Jim had said. At all. “The most efficient plan will be whatever you deem appropriate.”

Jim gave him a slightly questioning look, but seemed to accept this answer. He settled back into his seat, causing his neck to now be pressed fully against Spock’s thumb. He went to pull up another report on his PADD, then froze suddenly. Spock felt a sudden anxiety that wasn’t his own flood his body, and-

_he’s a touch telepath he’s a fucking touch telepath he’s been touching me this whole time oh god no no no FUCK_

Spock lurched back at that last word, the strength of it making him feel like he had just taken a punch straight to the stomach. The bridge crew turned to look confusedly at him, and then at Jim, who was staring straight ahead with a blank expression on his face. He stood up suddenly and purposefully strode towards the turbolift, his back a straight line. “Mr. Spock, follow me, please.” For one hysterical moment, the only thing Spock could think was _I would follow you to ends of the universe._

Needless to say, he followed Jim.

As soon as the turbolift was halfway between two decks, Jim put out a hand to stop it. His movements weren’t quite forceful, but they lacked his usual careless attitude, and Spock thought if Vulcans could be worried, he would be very worried right now. He told himself the vice-like grip he felt in the general vicinity of his heart was simply an after-effect of his shock on the bridge.

“You heard me. What I was thinking.” Jim finally turned towards Spock, his voice low and flat and completely unlike any tone Spock had ever heard from him.

“Yes. You have every right to be angry.” And he did, Spock thought. He had taken Jim’s thoughts without consent, simply because of the way they made him… feel, and it had been highly inappropriate.

That apparently had not been what Jim expected Spock to say.

“Wha- no, no, Spock, I’m not mad, I just… never wanted you to know about my… my, well, fuck, you know.” Jim’s usual voice was back, to Spock’s immense relief, though he sounded very confused.

“Your regard for me?”

Jim coughed out something that sounded like a laugh. “My regard for you? Spock,” he said empathetically, not seeming to realize how he was flailing his hands all over the place. “I think it’s past regard. It’s like, a big gigantic crush and I really just wanted to keep this professional, and that’s why I wanted to talk to you, ‘cause-”

“Crush?” Spock’s heart was hammering in his side so hard he thought it might escape, even though logically there was no way that could happen.

“Oh boy… okay, like, when a human-”

 _No, no, not what he had meant._ “I am aware what crush means in the romantic context of humans.”

Jim looked at him, exasperation drawn out on every line of his face. “Okay, then, will you just let me-”

“Why do you have a… a “crush” on me?” Spock asked, voice smaller than he had intended it to be.

“Oh my god, I… do you just want to make me feel worse about this?” Jim asked, backing a step away from Spock, hurt radiating off of him. “I can’t- I- I will be as professional as I can be and you won’t have to think about this ever again just please don’t _ask_ me to, to do that. To tell you why I like you. I know I seem to talk about feelings all the time, but I can’t do that.” He reached a hand out to start the turbolift again and Spock panicked, his own hand snapping out to catch Jim’s wrist before he could stop himself. They stayed frozen like that for what felt like an eternity, arms outstretched, and Spock didn’t dare to breathe. Jim was the first to speak.

“O-okay, uh, obviously you have more to say so… go for it, if you want.” Jim’s eyes were wide, looking at Spock with a mixture of panic and uncertainty.

“I… apologize for listening to your thoughts.”

“Spock, we already-”

 _I didn’t want to stop._ “I think it would be beneficial for us to be involved in a romantic relationship together.”

Jim took a surprised step back as Spock slowly moved a hand up to cover his own mouth. He had not been sure what he wanted to say, but it certainly hadn’t been _that_.

“Are you… are you joking? Are you trying to make some awful Vulcan joke, because that would just be…” Jim trailed off as Spock mutely shook his head, and he must’ve seen something Spock’s eyes because his expression immediately softened and he stepped back into Spock’s space. “Hey, okay, it’s okay, you- you don’t have to keep your hand over your mouth, here…”

And Jim gently grabbed Spock’s hand and tangled their fingers together between their chests.

_This must be how I die._

Jim jumped a little bit, and looked down at their hands. “Did you just... ?”

Spock felt himself flush green. “I did not mean to project my thoughts. My shields are not at their usual strength due to the… circumstances.” Spock glanced at their hands, and Jim _squeezed his fingers_. Spock’s knees turned to jelly, and he swore softly in Vulcan. “Jim, I think it is imperative you know that hands are erogenous zones for Vulcans-” Jim made a startled choking sound “-and this would be considered extremely inappropriate in public anywhere on Vulcan.” Jim dropped his hand, and Spock tried not to let himself feel disappointed.

“Wow uh, okay, definitely gonna be figuring _that_ out later, but…” Jim looked up at Spock, who suddenly realized how close they were to each other. “Spock. Do you even, like, _like_ me?”

Spock blinked once, twice. “I do not understand.”

“Like, are you just saying we should date because you feel bad that I like you, or like, just ‘cause you think it’d be fun to, or… oh god I don’t even know-”

“I have, as you say, “liked” you for 4.93 years.”

Jim’s mouth dropped open. “That’s… oh my god, that’s before _Khan_ , Spock-”

“I was not aware of the exact nature of my feelings at that time, but yes, you are corre-” Spock was cut off by soft lips pressing hard into his own. He stumbled back in surprise, unsure of where to put his hands or whether to tilt his head or what to _do_ -

“You think too loud,” Jim mumbled into Spock’s mouth, and he could feel the smile both in Jim’s voice and on his lips.

“I could say the same for you, Jim.”

Jim pulled back and laughed, pressing his face into Spock’s collarbone. Spock tentatively wrapped his arms around Jim's waist and was gratified when Jim leaned further into him.'

“For the record, I’ve loved you since… well, since I stopped hating you? And I’m not as good as numbers as you are but I think it’s been even longer than you’ve liked me. God, we’re idiots.” Spock could feel Jim smile into his chest again, but he was frozen in place. Jim looked up, confusion darting across his features. “Spock, what’s wrong? Was that too shocking or som- oh god, I said love, didn’t I.”

Spock simply nodded.

“Okay, uhm, well- I can’t really, deny it, ‘cause- fuck, I just didn’t want to freak you out-”

“Jim.”

Jim stopped, out of breath, and Spock watched his throat move as he swallowed before looking back up. “Yeah.”

“I… am entirely sure that I love you also.”

Spock palpably felt Jim’s relief, even as he brightly laughed as if he hadn’t been worried just seconds ago. “No exact percentage, Mr. Spock?”

“Perhaps I could come up with one if you endeavored to kiss me the human way again.” Spock felt a small smile creep across his face, completely unable to try to stop it at this moment and unsure if he even wanted to.

Jim’s laughter rang out bright and true as he wrapped his arms around Spock’s neck, and no matter how many times Spock heard that laugh in the rest of his life, he always seemed to remember that particular one the clearest.

“Why, Mr. Spock, I would be more than happy to.”

Spock let his eyes flutter closed, already anticipating Jim’s lips on his own. He waited for a beat, then-

“Hold on, are you saying there’s a _Vulcan_ way to kiss?”

Spock felt a sudden warmth spread through him as he held two fingers up and Jim matched him perfectly, minds sparking against each other. “This makes the telepathy aided by touch clearer,” _between two bondmates_ , he finished as a thought.

_that is so neat and romantic and cool and wow_

_You need to work on the finesse of your thoughts, Jim._

Jim grinned up at Spock, eyes shining. “No, I don’t.”

Spock made a noncommittal hum, and then felt a burst of thought so strong it almost made him take a step back.

_love you i love you lovelovelove_

And even though the thought was jumbled and messy and almost too much, it was so perfectly _Jim_ , and there was a hopeful sort of feeling blossoming in Spock’s chest, and Jim kissed him again and Spock knew contentment but this was _happiness_ and all he could hear in his head was Jim, bright golden beautiful-

_I love you._

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading!! im in a constant state of working on ficlets so if you ever have a prompt you want to see written you can find me on tumblr at @rosegoldspock


End file.
